Heart on Your Sleeve

Growing up, I would get my feelings hurt.  A lot.  I’d come home from school and cry to my mother about something.  She’d say (in her Worcester, MA accent), “Frances, you have to stop wearing your heart on your sleeve!”  What in the heck was she talking about?  She explained that it was a saying.  “When people are sensitive, it’s like they wear their feelings on the outside of their bodies, readily available for others to poke.”  Is this an ailment?  How can I change this?  As an empath herself, I think she may have struggled with what this all meant and how to cope with it herself.  Over the years of reaching out to my mother about this, her only suggestion was to “toughen up” to not be
“so sensitive.”  My guess is that she really didn’t want me to struggle like she did.

Being a “sensitive” or an “empath” isn’t really something you can change, because it’s a feeling that is incapable of rewiring.  Trust me.  I tried.  I learned to just work with it.  As a nurse, I knew things.  Things that really couldn’t be explained.  Nurse’s intuition?  Maybe.  But, the feelings were growing.  If there was too much chaos (energy) in a room or a situation, it put me on overload.  I would shut down, and sometimes for days.  I remember my mother doing the same thing.  The pattern was becoming a little dark and I felt the light inside of me dimming.  Someone recently asked me at a training, “What does it feel like to be an empath?”  My explanation was simply this, “I feel everyone’s emotion in the room.  I know who’s happy, sad, or struggling with something.  It would be like you, walking into a room, and everyone that was in it was coming up to you and poking you.  That’s what I feel, but on an emotional level.”

As my light was dimming, an opportunity arose for me to embark on a medical sales career, which ultimately was a saving grace.  I learned through presentations and the energy that I put out there, well, I could control the room.  Sure, there would be a naysayer once in a while, but I could handle that.  And, I did.  This was a career that served me well as it allowed me to understand myself as an empath.

Now, I just want to use this energy, wisdom, and intuition to the best of my abilities.  To help others.  To offer insight, free of judgement.  To reach out to my fellow empaths with an embrace of “I know” how you feel.  To empower and enlighten all that are on this roller coaster life journey together.  I’m finally in a profession where I can just be me.  Wow.  I cannot tell you how amazing it is to use all your knowledge and intuition to help others.  The “curse” that I felt as an empath growing up, has now morphed into a blessing.  Namaste, my friends!

 

 

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