Empaths and Weight

I absorb energy as an empath.  When I encounter positive energy, I suck it up like a sponge.  I feel a newfound sense of vitality and my energy levels soar.  I love hanging out with that one, truly positive person, as it can fill my cup for long periods of time.  It’s like popping a fully charged battery into the core of my being.  Negativity, on the other hand, is something that leaves me drained and fatigued.

Negativity depletes my gas tank so I’m running on empty.  If we think of energy as fuel, then how do I refuel my tank?  My #1 go to has always been food.  There are definitely some pros and cons to this refueling strategy.  Initially, I do need food to regain my energy.  While it is unknown how many calories you burn dodging negativity or re-framing a negative conversation, I don’t think it’s as much as what I tend to eat.  Over the years this has led to fluctuations in my weight.  What I’ve learned is that when I’m thin, I have less “padding” to absorb negativity and when continually exposed to negativity, I gain weight.  If you look at twentieth-century faith healers, you will notice that they were all grossly obese.  Why is this?  It’s because they, as well as myself,  were not attuned to blocking negative energy.   We take it on as our own and we eat to refuel.  The big question is now, what do we do about it because certainly, we don’t want to compound refueling with a health crisis.

Here are some interventions to break the over-fueling cycle:

  1. First and foremost protect yourself.  We hear this all the time and yet we forget.  An empath friend of mine likes to say, “bubble up” which simply means to visualize yourself safe within a protective bubble.  I like to call on Archangel Michael to protect me with his beautiful blue light from all seen and unseen entities.
  2. Keep healthy, non-processed foods in your refrigerator as a “go-to” for energetic eating.  I keep celery sticks readily available so I can just crunch away when I’m feeling depleted.  For me, it’s all in the crunch!  I also do meal prep in advance, so I can heat up a healthy, frozen meal instead of overeating while cooking or trying to think of something healthy to cook.
  3. Take a bath or shower.  I’m a bath person, so I’ll plop myself in the tub and soak for a while.  I stay in until all the water has drained, picturing all negative energy going down the drain.  Empaths love water!
  4. Take a few deep breaths.  When I’m in a situation where I feel negative energy, I take a few deep breaths.  On the exhale, I picture myself blowing away all negative energy and breathing in positive energy on the inhale.
  5. Get in a quick,  3-5 minute meditation.  If you’re an empath, you MUST have a  meditation practice.  No excuses.  Download the free app “Insight Timer” and pick a short meditation.  You will feel energetically repleted.
  6. Get some energy work done by a reputable Reiki Master.  I’m a Reiki Master, but I still get regular sessions from someone that I adore.  It’s nice to have that extra insight and guidance from an objective person.
  7. Surround yourself with positive people.  The main people in your life should support and encourage you, lift you up, and be a source of enjoyment.  There is no room for bad relationships in an empath’s life.  Set healthy boundaries and stick to them.
  8. Check-in with yourself and identify any triggers in your eating.  Am I eating this because of feelings, thoughts, or emotions that I haven’t dealt with?  I ate at my ex-husband for years!  Once I became aware of this trigger, I was able to change it!  Awareness is key in eliciting change.
  9. Keep a journal and write, write, write.  The ONLY way to be less in your head and more in your heart is by giving those thoughts an exit strategy.  The pen is the conduit.  No exceptions.
  10. If you are on any form of social media (and who isn’t these days), make it all positive.  If there is any negativity, delete it.  Delete friends and family who aren’t supporting you.  This may sound harsh, but you have got to protect yourself.  In addition, don’t complain about your life or vent to others on social media.  This brings more negativity into your life.
  11. Because I’m a spiritual person, I will always encourage prayer.  It’s something that you can ALWAYS do in ANY situation, great or small.  Check-in with whatever Higher Power resonates with you.  You will be amazed at how the situation will change, not only within yourself but within others.  When you elevate YOUR vibration, others naturally respond.

I love hearing from all of you, so let me know how you’re doing as an empath in this awesome world!

From Head to Heart

It is often said that in order to live a full spectrum life, it is essential to connect the head and the heart.  This connection allows for greater happiness in all relationships, not just personal relationships, but professional relationships as well.  I work with a lot of clients who have simply closed off their hearts.  This may have been from hurts of the past, trauma, or simply over-thinking and/or being over-analytical utilizing brain power more than heart power.  In addition, cultural norms may have told men that it’s not okay to have too much sensitivity toward others and no one should be sensitive in the work environment. This simply isn’t the truth.  When we are able to connect the head to the heart all forms of happiness, prosperity, and bliss find their way into our lives.  Our health increases and we ward off diseases.

The poet, Mark Nepo writes, “The longest journey you will ever take is from your head to your heart.”  When I began this process several years ago, I found a lot of information on the importance of this connection, but there wasn’t a lot of information on how to do it.  So, let’s begin.  Here are a few easy steps you can take to work on connecting the head and the heart:

  1.  Be grateful!  When I discover a client has a closed heart, this is an easy way to begin.  I’ll simply ask, “What are 3 things you are grateful for right now?”  Start with the basics such as a roof over my head, a steady paycheck, and food on the table, and branch out from there.  Find a small notebook and write down 3 things you are grateful for before sleep.  The only rule is that you have to come up with 3 new things every day.
  2. Listen with your heart.  When you are listening to others, don’t focus on what YOU want to say next, as this keeps you in your head, instead simply listen.  I experimented first with friends and family and then branched off into business relationships and employees.  The context of the conversation became richer and deeper.  People enjoyed talking to me, even briefly, because empathy and understanding were present.  Relationships grew and became more meaningful.
  3. Be present.  Live in the moment.  Enjoy what you have right now, in this time and in this space.  Avoid distractions and fill your time with social media, checking emails, or turning on the TV.  Maya Angelou says,  “Do nothing.  Just sit and do nothing.”  This is unheard of in our day in age, but a necessity for a more meaningful life.

Remember, connecting the head to the heart is a process; something that is constantly growing and evolving.  Start with the 3 steps above and make it a part of your everyday routine.  The important thing to remember is to just start!  You’ll begin to notice subtle changes in your life.  You’ll feel calmer, more at peace, you smile more, you don’t let things bother you as much, relationships are enhanced and prosperity in all aspects of your life begins to find you.  I have every faith in you!  Just start…..today!

Please follow franwinslow.com for additional ways to live a more meaningful and prosperous life.  You can also schedule a free discovery session with Fran to unlock your full potential and live the life you’ve always imagined.

The Littered Highway

It was time for an adventure.  I had been wanting to visit the Oregon Coast for years and decided, okay, this is my adventure!  My firstborn lives in Portland, so a plan was devised.  I would pick Nikki and a friend up in Portland and we would drive along the coast and stay in South Beach.  The beach was really putting out distress signals and needed me there, and I wasn’t going to disappoint the beach!

I grappled with the idea of flying in versus driving.  If I flew, I would just go in for a long weekend.  Somehow, that didn’t seem long enough, and finding an animal sitter for all my animals is tough.  So, I decided to drive and take my puppies.  I researched where to stay and made my hotel reservations, as I was breaking the trip up into 3 segments.  Since I was going to miss my Bible class, I asked Rev. Barry (my instructor) what I should study.  He suggested (since I’m a total Bible newbie) to get all the parables and stories on audiobooks.  Great!  So I downloaded quite a few as well as “The Story of Judas.”  I was all set!  The road was really calling to me and the time leading up to my departure seemed to pass by slower than a 100-year-old turtle crossing the road.

Finally, the day arrived.  I loaded up the car, got the puppies situated, and hit the road.  Eight hours later, I was in Salt Lake City.  I have to say that the drive through Wyoming to get to Utah was pretty blah for sightseeing.  I toggled between Bible stories and song playlists.  I caught myself listening to an old song and a vivid memory would pop into my head.  It was something that I needed to heal.  The tears would come.  I would let them come, I would remember, I would heal them and let them go.  By the time I got to the hotel on my first night, I was tired.  I wasn’t sure if it was from the drive or the healing, and honestly, it didn’t matter.  The next day of driving was easier; only about 6 hours to my stop in Boise, ID.

When I got back into the car, something had changed.  I felt a newfound sense of freedom.  Again, I toggled between the Bible and the songs of my life.  Again, the tears came and the healing ensued.  By the time I reached Boise, I was exhausted.  I knew what this was from.  I couldn’t just loaf around in my hotel room and rest because I was meeting a very dear friend for dinner.  Let me tell you, this young lady had taken a chance on me way back when during a time in my life when I needed someone to believe in me.  She was one of the BEST bosses that I have ever had during my career as an instructor and personal trainer.  I hadn’t seen her in 12 years or so and I was really looking forward to it.

As she approached me to walk to the restaurant, there was this beautiful light that surrounded her.  The essence of who I remember was still the same, but something had changed.  We chatted over dinner and it was clear that she was on the very same path to enlightenment that I had embarked on about 4 years ago.  It started, for both of us, with yoga and continues to grow.  It was hard to say goodbye to this kindred spirit, but there is a knowing that comes when you are with another enlightened soul.  We are all connected and our paths will cross again.  I got back to the hotel feeling so blessed!  I snuggled in with my puppies and fell into a deep sleep, surrounded by bliss.

On day #3, I awoke to the sound of pure joy in my heart, for at the end of this day I will be with my Nikki!  I tell you when your children grow and leave you it is by far the hardest thing you will ever do in your life.  You grapple with did I teach them everything they needed to know?  Will they be okay?  And, then, the moment arrives when you get to see them and know that they are the most gorgeous humans in the world, thriving, surviving, all that this world has to give them.  Seeing that fit, together, sassy firstborn again just had me smiling from ear to ear.  We picked up her friend and headed to the coast.

If you’ve never been to the Oregon Coast, I suggest you put this on your list of places to see.  We stayed in a cottage right on the beach.  South Beach is pretty secluded and it was just what I needed.  The sand is firm, yet soft, and the ocean waters are cold on your feet.   Nikki fixed us a feast that first night and we lit a fire and we were all surrounded by love.

Our time on the beach was brief.  We ate good food, had great conversations, didn’t get on each others’ nerves too terribly bad (after all we ARE family), and left for Portland and Nikki’s church early Sunday morning.  This accepting church was simply amazing, we ate more AWESOME vegan food.  I slept like a queen in her loft at the house she shares with 2 other wonderful souls.  The puppies and I felt like we were in a tree house and the space was quiet with a wonderful vibe!  I was sad to say goodbye and embark on my journey back home, but it was necessary.

The stops on my way home were only altered by staying with a new friend that is close to Boise.  Talk about another enlightened soul!  It was a wonderful night filled with delicious fresh veggies and a trip to a roadside veggie and fruit stand.  I was all set with fresh eats for the rest of the journey home.

The last 2 legs of my trip were filled with more spiritual growth, and more tears, as I littered up the highways on my way home with thoughts that no longer served me.  By the time I reached Denver, something inside of me was very different.  I felt a new sense of peace and love that grew within my heart along that 8-day journey.

What I have noticed since returning home is that I feel “lighter.”  That road trip changed my life.  When I’m asked about my trip I just say, “It was amazing.”  People may think that it was the sites, the people, or the places, and yes, that’s part of it, but the work I did during those long hours on the road,  has healed things inside of me; things I didn’t even realize needed healing.  Every tear that I shed along my journey, opened up space in my heart for new, wonderful things to find me.  In the movie, “Eat, Pray, Love” Liz (Julia Roberts) is in search of the “God within.”  I found it along those stretches of highway between Denver and the Oregon Coast and back again.  I will be forever grateful for this opportunity.

It’s Back-Breaking Work

I remember my parents using the term “back-breaking work” when I was growing up.  It referred to work that required a heaping ton of manual labor.  For instance, the work I did yesterday.  I’m in the process of moving into a neglected property (an acreage) in another part of Colorado.  We have been having a lot of rain here and no one had been mowing the lawn (or more accurately, thistles and dandelions.)  So I purchased the cheapest push mower with an engine that I could find and decided to go mow.

When I arrived to the property, the weeds were literally halfway up my shins.  I fired up my new, shiny, red Toro and began to hack away.  Those 90 minutes of mowing required the strength of my entire body.  There were times when I was certain that I wouldn’t make it, wiping sweat off my face, barely able to catch my breath, but I made it!

By the time I arrived back home, pain and stiffness were starting to set in.  I thought it would be a good idea to still go to my hot yoga class.  Where I found the strength to get through, who knows!  Overnight, ice packs and ibuprofen were my besties.  As I lay flat on my ice pack in the quiet stillness of the night, it got me thinking.  We will put forth tons of physical effort to see the fruits of our labor.  But, will we put forth the effort it takes mentally to make the changes in our lives to be emotionally strong?

It comes down to having a vision.  What kept me going with the mowing yesterday was my vision.  I had a vision of how that yard was going to look freshly mowed.  I could smell the freshly cut grass, and noticed how there was more grass under the shade of the trees where there was more moisture.  I envisioned that with some TLC this summer, more beautiful grass, flowers planted in the flower beds, some container gardens, etc, and it got me through that mowing hell!

So, it’s easy for us to do the back-breaking work necessary for, let’s stick with my example, of a beautiful yard.  Will we be willing to put forth that same amount of work for our emotional health?  Do we have a vision for ourselves?  Can you envision a life of happiness and joy?  If not, it’s time to get out the mower, dandelion digger, and shovel, chop down and dig up the thistles and dandelions that are keeping your beautiful, lush, green grass from flourishing and growing.  Will there be some pain involved?  Yes.  It’s a given, but I promise you, it gets better and you will heal.  Little by little as you remove the choking weeds that keep you stagnant, the clouds of uncertainty and fear will begin to dissipate.  In its place, you will notice the rays of sunshine peeking through the clouds.  Soon, you will be that strong flower that aims its face into the full sun smiling, even as you take a few knocks from the rains that are necessary for your growth.

I encourage all of you, as you feel the physical pains from over-extending yourself, to let it be a reminder.  Have I done this amount of work to stretch my emotional wellness lately?  If the answer is “no” well then, you know where to find me.

As always, please feel free to contact me with any questions.

That Darn Ego

If you’re like me, I always thought that the ego referred to something “big.”  My favorite saying was, “That so-and-so has an ego the size of Texas!”  I used to work around a lot of big egos, so I naturally assumed that the ego was this self-absorbed, pompous being that just grew out of control.  Well….not necessarily.

Brace yourselves.  This big ego can also keep you small.  Yes, folks, that darn ego is the voice that tells you that you are unworthy, you don’t deserve THAT, how could you ever make THAT happen, you’re not good enough….and the list goes on and on.  For some of my clients, it has manifested into “You’re always going to have pain,” and “You will never be normal again.”  Logically, we know that this isn’t true, but that ego keeps resurfacing,  doesn’t it?  So what can we do about it?

The first step is awareness.  Now that you’ve read this blog and realize, hey, I do the same thing, kudos to you for being aware!  So, when you’re having a challenging day, let’s say with pain and that voice says, “You’re always going to have pain” you can challenge that ego and quiet it down with phrases such as, “No, that isn’t true.  I have good days and I believe I can be pain-free in the future.”  Here’s another example, “Why would I even bother to apply for that job.  I’m sure there are other people out there more qualified than me.”  Quiet down that bad boy by saying, “No, that’s not true.  I have tons of experience and I bet no one else has my motivation and drive along with this killer personality.”  Are you getting the gist?

Another step in the process of managing the ego is by showing it kindness and compassion.  I bet you’re thinking, what in the heck is she talking about?  Think of it this way.  Your big, small ego was born out of fear.  Fear of not getting that job or maybe you tried and didn’t get it.  Fear that when you walked an extra block you were down with an exacerbation of pain for a few days.  So, the big, small ego was born.  It says, “Don’t apply for that job.  Remember what happened last time?”  So it’s doing its job of keeping you “safe.”  Keeping you safe and not experiencing failure or success is the breeding ground for complacency and a blah life, wishing you had done things differently.  So show that ego kindness.  You can say, “Okay, that did happen in the past, but that doesn’t mean it’s going to happen again because look at how much I’ve grown.  I’m going for it!”

Now, as you go about your day, you are AWARE of that darn ego and how it might be holding you back.  I have every faith in you that you can realign this way of thinking!  For by doing so, you bring more joy, self-acceptance, and self-confidence into your lives.

For more tips and tricks on dealing with the ego, please contact me.


So, you’ve gotten a pretty scary diagnosis.  You’re following your doctor’s orders as prescribed.  Maybe you’re undergoing chemotherapy, radiation, or recovering from surgery.  My question to you is, “Where is your mind and thought process during this time?”

We’ve all heard stories of people receiving miraculous recoveries.  What did those people do to assist their healing process?  Dr. Joe Dispenza talks about how he used the power within himself to heal.  Dr. Dispenza was participating in a triathlon when he was hit by a truck.  He had several vertebral fractures and was told he would need surgery and ultimately he would be paralyzed with or without the surgery.  He decided to heal himself.  Within 11 weeks time, he was back in his office seeing patients.  This has led to his lifelong research in the mind-body connection.

One thing that Dr. Dispenza did not sway from, is setting clear intentions and visualization for healing.  If his thoughts diverted to anything negative or not focusing on the “prize”, he would simply guide them back to the task at hand; healing his spine.

I wholeheartedly believe in the mind-body connection for healing.  Clear the pathways in your life and in your mind that isn’t serving the purpose of your healing.  Remove any blocks such as naysayers, toxic people, etc. that may impede your positive thoughts on healing.  In addition, monitor your stress levels.  What things are raising your feelings of stress?  Can you reduce them right then and there on the spot with just a couple of deep breaths?

I have seen great results with my clients all along the continuum of the healing process.  When you reduce outer forces, clear your mind, focus on visualization, and keep your thoughts positive, all types of healing occur.

For more information on visualization and other modalities to enhance healing in your life, please feel free to contact me.

Is Your Tire Flat?

When we think of living a healthy, balanced life, what does that mean to you?  Think of your life like a bicycle tire.  When all the spokes are steady, strong, in place, and there’s plenty of air in the tire, you are ready to take off and ride!  But, what happens when a spoke is missing?  You get a flat!

When I began my journey to health over 3 years ago, I did the “doctor” things for sure; diet and exercise.  I was lucky to find an awesome yoga instructor, that was more of a healer.  I took a deep dive into other aspects of my life:  1) Parenting…Yup.  Kids in college and doing well; 2) Personal Development…Check.  3) Career….Check; 4) Finance…. Check.  5) Health/Aging….Yup.  Working on that; 6)  Relationships (social and personal)…. this has always been a work in progress, but better in Colorado; 7) Fun and enjoyment….Again, this is something that I actively work on; 8) Spiritual awareness…..oh HELL no!  This was my FLAT tire!

In a conversation with a friend of mine, she asked me about my spirituality.  I said, “God is in my heart.  I don’t need organized religion.”  The fact of the matter was that I had left Catholicism many years ago.  I couldn’t even remember the last time I had prayed!  I was sick and tired of all that sin and punishment and I never felt as though I was a good person; constantly striving to be a better person and always feeling as though I had missed the mark, so I left.

Now, I’m faced with my flat tire, so what do I do?  A friend of mine had mentioned an all-inclusive church here in Denver, and while intrigued, again, organized religion just didn’t feel right.  She continued to encourage me, and I decided to go to Mile Hi Church on Easter Sunday in 2017.  That was it for me.  Everyone was so warm and welcoming and the service was amazing!  Then, Jennifer Burnett sang the song, “In the Land of I Am” and the tears flowed.  Healing tears.  For you see, my relationship with God and my spirituality had been such an important part of me for the majority of my life, and I missed it.  The first key to change is self-awareness.  I was bonked on the head with this BIG TIME!

In almost a year following that Easter Service, I’ve only missed a few Sunday services.  I’ve taken classes there to continue with my healing and find my way back to my spirituality.  Actually, if I’m totally honest here, my spirituality has gone to levels never previously experienced.  I am at peace.  I am happy.  I have healed those old wounds of the past, and now I am a healer.

So, when we talk about living a healthy and balanced life, you HAVE to look at all the spokes on your wheel.  What’s missing that will cause you to get a flat?  What just needs a little more air?  When you truly take a long, hard look at the things in your life that lead to happiness, look at your spirituality.  Without it, nothing else will take off, and don’t you want a nice, smooth ride with a bump once in a while?

High Vibe is Where the Magic Happens

Have you ever heard of high vibrational living?  I’ll be honest with you, it’s definitely where the magic happens!  By magic, I mean a happier and healthier lifestyle, and who isn’t about that?

Let’s face it.  Everything is energy!  So to understand the high-vibration life, you need to understand energy.  The chair you’re sitting in right now gives off energy.  Everything is about vibrational frequency and some things give off more than others.  Have you ever met someone and been immediately attracted to something about them?  You were probably tapping into their vibrational frequency and I’m guessing it was high!  Inversely, have you ever walked into a home and felt “creepy” about something there?  Again, you are tapping into the energy in the home.  When we are attuned to various types of energies, or vibrations, this can have a significant impact on our lives.  Raising our own vibrations can enhance our health and guide us into a happier life!  Here are some easy ways you can incorporate high vibrational living into your current lifestyle:

  1.  Eat an organic and/or vegan diet.  I’m a huge advocate for this type of lifestyle because it changed mine immensely.  Not only were the results in my blood work, but it opened up my heart to other opportunities, and I was happier!
  2. Use pure-grade essential oils, liberally!  I spray my shower every morning with essential oils, wear them on my body, put them on my feet at night, and keep a mixture of some of my favorites in the diffuser all day long.
  3. Sing, dance, and hug as much as possible.  The more you move, the more you raise your vibration!  And hugging, come on.  There’s nothing better than the human touch!
  4. Be grateful!  Start a gratitude journal.  Focusing on what you do have, instead of what you don’t have, shifts you into high vibe mode!  Find 3-5 things to write down every night before sleep and watch how your life changes!
  5. Meditate.  Calming down the “monkey mind” helps to release the anxiety that is most certainly low vibration.  Meditating even 10-15 minutes per day can change your life drastically.  I always suggest starting small.  It took me a long time to incorporate meditation into my daily practice.  Pop in a YouTube guided meditation video on your phone, put on some headphones, and have at it!  When your mind wanders, gently say “thank you but not right now” and bring it back to the video.  And oh man, do your gratitude journal first, then meditate. You’ll be feeling amazing in about 2 weeks!
  6. Drink plenty of water!  We all absorb toxicity from various things on a daily basis.  Keeping up with your water flushes out the toxins and lets the high vibe do its thing!
  7. Be aware of your thoughts.  Everything you think and say can and will have an impact.  I remember when I first started paying attention to my “self-talk.”  I found myself saying “Fran, you’re an idiot” every time I messed up.  When I changed that simple phrase into, “Fran, you’re really not an idiot.  You’re a well-educated woman” my life soared into high vibe mode!
  8. Random acts of kindness.  When you give to others without expecting anything in return, you enter into the universal flow of giving and receiving.  And, we all know that when you have the mindset of “I have enough to spare and share” you enter into a more abundant lifestyle.  Abundance is definitely a high vibe!
  9. Appreciate the beauty in your life!  Watch a beautiful sunrise and be thankful (you could even write this in your gratitude journal!)  There’s beauty all around you every day.  Find it and appreciate it.  I can feel your vibe soaring from here!
  10. Do something in nature.  Go for a hike, or a swim, or simply take off your shoes and wiggle your toes in the grass or sand.  We need the negative ions from the ground and this most certainly helps with raising our vibration.
  11. Say “NO” to something that zaps your energy!  This one is my personal favorite.  Save your high vibes for YOU and don’t give them away!
  12. Don’t shout or argue.  This is definitely a low vibe.  If you feel you are about to lose control and raise your voice, take 2 deep breaths and rethink the situation.  Walk outside for a minute if you need to.  Remember, this robs you of a healthy life!
  13. Declutter your life.  Do you have too much junk on your desk at work?  Declutter it and watch your productivity rise.  Do you have too much junk at home?  Declutter it.  Put out 3 garbage bags per day and get rid of anything you aren’t using until your space is free of clutter.  Clearing your home space most certainly will help your vibe as well as the vibe of all occupants in the home.
  14. Spend time with high-vibe people!  This is another one of my personal favorites!  I just got back from a girl’s weekend in the mountains and feel amazing about it!  When you are with friends who love and support you, there’s no drama; only lifting one another up.  Your vibe will thank you big time!
  15. Smile at everyone you meet.  Your smile is contagious.  People smile back.  Again, this gets you into universal flow, which raises your vibe!

Embracing a high-vibrational lifestyle isn’t difficult.  Start out small and be aware of the changes you are making.  Self-awareness is key to a happy life.  If you need any more guidance on embarking on this type of healthy lifestyle, please feel free to contact me.  Peace to your hearts, peeps!

Heal the Past and Move On

Today, as I was doing my early morning Ubering/Coaching around, I picked up a gentleman from the airport.  As he got into the car he said, “I hope you don’t mind that I’m on the phone.”  I replied, “Not at all.  It’s your time.”  He went from one call to another, relaying story after story, stretching the truth within each call and each story.  I would describe him as almost charming as he manipulated his conversations on the phone.   On his last call prior to the end of the ride, he was speaking with a female; flirting with the female, talking about her nap, etc., etc.  When he hung up, he asked me some questions about where I was from, and I then asked him where he was from.  He replied, “My wife and I have been in Colorado now for almost 20 years, but I’m originally from Mobile, AL.”

Now, it would be easy for me to make a judgment call about this gentleman, but I decided to go another route.  I watched him walk up to his white house with the black iron fence around it in a very prestigious neighborhood,  and I made a conscious effort to shift what I was thinking to myself.  Why did listening to his conversations bother me?  Why was I feeling sort of nauseated and sick to my stomach?  What was this gentleman triggering in me?  I started processing the answers on my drive home, and it hit me.  This had been MY life.  I had been exposed to that wheeler/dealer mentality when I was in sales, and while I had always done business with my integrity and morals intact, I saw a lot of things that others did that didn’t agree with me. I took these things to heart and kept on with my career to earn a living.  I put blinders on.

Anyway, today in the car, that wheeler/dealer gentleman brought all that back to me.  I thought I had moved away from a plethora of feelings associated with my life in medical sales, but there are still some things that need to be addressed, forgiven, and healed.  We often forget that this life is a journey without a destination.  It’s 2 steps forward, only to go 5 back.  And, that’s okay.  When we develop a keen sense of self-awareness, we can experience the emotions and then set the ones free that aren’t serving us.  I’m setting lots of feelings free today, and I’m excited about this!   I know that when I do this,  it unclogs my heart and creates a path for wonderful feelings and experiences to find their way in.  Today, I choose to forgive myself for wearing blinders.  For I know that when I let go, I let love.

And speaking of hearts, peace, and love to all you wonderful hearts out there!  Namaste.

Tools for Troubling Times

I’ve had numerous conversations about the state of our country and our world in the last few months.  People have become distraught, nervous about their finances, and fearful for their lives and the safety of their children.  I don’t blame them.  I’ve grappled with the same constellation of feelings.  Here are some of the things that I’ve personally done over the last few months that have helped me immensely and hopefully they will resonate with you as well.

  1.  Limit your exposure to the news.  I advocate watching it to be informed, but after the first round of updates, shut it off.
  2. Start a journal of all the things you are grateful for in your life.  Update this list daily and read it before you go to bed and then again upon arising.  When we are in the thick of despair, it may be tough to find things to be grateful for.  I started with being thankful for my warm animals, my cute little condo in Colorado, etc.  You’ll get the hang of it!
  3. Meditate!  Don’t think it’s for you?  I’m here to tell you that you’re full of crap and it’s for everyone!  Download the Headspace app to your phone.  They offer a free trial with meditations that only last about 10 minutes.  Once you’re hooked, you can either purchase additional meditations or go to YouTube and search for guided meditation.  There are a million on there.  I personally like to meditate with the angels, so I’ll search for something along those lines.  You will be amazed at how calm and better equipped you are in managing the stress in your lives with daily meditation.
  4. Find some way to be compassionate toward others.  Share your smile, a kind word, or a compliment to all you come in contact with during the day.  You never know when someone is going through a tough time.  It might be just the pick-me-up they needed!
  5. Dance and Sing.  Yup.  You heard that right.  Get down and boogie!  Crank up the tunes and make your living room a dance floor for at least 15 minutes.  In addition, sing.  If you’re multi-talented, you can do both at the same time!  If not, crank up the tunes in the car and sing your little heart out.  No one is going to hear you and who cares if you can’t sing.  You’ll be amazed at how much better you feel!
  6. Pray.  I’m here to tell you that collective prayer can elicit HUGE changes.  There’s actually a book by Lynne McTaggart called “The Power of Eight.”  It’s worth a read and speaks volumes to healing and changing the world with prayer.
  7. Get out in nature.  This can even be considered a moving meditation or prayer.  Even if it’s cold, bundle up and get out there!  Kick around the snow and have some fun.  Make snow angels!

You cannot change what’s happening with our country overnight, but you CAN change your response to it.  Work within your own circle throughout the day.  Show kindness and compassion to those at work, in the grocery line, in yoga class, at the gym, and for goodness sake, dump the road rage and let someone merge into your lane!  Do you get the gist?  And always remember, if you’re struggling, you have a coach right here that can help you make the changes necessary for a wonderful life of joy!  Until next time, peeps. Peace to your hearts!