Author: franwinslow23gmailcom

The word, “integrity” has come up several times this week.  What does integrity mean to you?  To me, it’s my moral compass.  It’s the rules and norms that I have in place for myself.  It makes me who I am.  It is my truth.  But honestly, I really haven’t given it much thought until this week.

When I was in medical sales, I left a couple of companies because I didn’t like what I was seeing.  With a background in nursing, I made a promise to “do no harm.”  Because of this, my moral compass pointed me in the direction of compounded, topical pain medications.  To say that I loved what I did would be an understatement.  Patients were calling me, hugging me, and writing to the company stating their pain was either gone or at a level that they could live with.  I helped people every day and was rewarded with a free-flowing abundance in finances and opportunities.  Our company thrived and grew in ways never imagined.  Unfortunately, “bad players” found their way into this therapy and abused the system, ultimately leading to its near demise, and I was heartbroken. I KNEW this was relieving patients’ pain all across the nation.

It’s been a few years now, and I hadn’t really thought of that story until this week.  I was having a conversation with a government official who had been instrumental in finding these “bad players” in my beloved topical world.  In this person’s opinion, the therapy didn’t work, was overpriced, and was just a scam.  I took the opportunity to educate and inform.  I explained how every physician that either myself or my direct reports called on, was educated in the therapy.  Questions were answered by pharmacists trained in compounding, and sometimes by even the guru himself that truly started and saw a vision for this therapy.  I talked about the times when we were asked to do things by accounts that didn’t align with the vision of the company, our morals and values as salespeople, and any other necessary actions that needed to take place.  At the end of the conversation, the government official thanked me.  Thanked me for having “integrity” in the medical profession and explained that when you only see the bad behaviors, you forget that there are people, companies, and therapies that are beneficial to patients.

How did I feel after this encounter?  Good.  I had given my heart and soul to a therapy that worked for patients and was ultimately removed from their treatment options due to the greed of others.  I voiced my role in compounds and used the opportunity to educate.  It was a productive day!  I looked at the clock and I still had time to make it to my hot yoga class.  As the class got underway,  the instructor talked about getting into difficult poses and how it’s your “integrity” that allows you to challenge yourself.  There’s that word again, in a completely different context, but the meaning remains the same.   Integrity.  It keeps your head held high, allows you to sleep well at night, gets you into poses and positions that you never could imagine, and is your truth.  Namaste, you wonderful souls.  😉

Growing up, I would get my feelings hurt.  A lot.  I’d come home from school and cry to my mother about something.  She’d say (in her Worcester, MA accent), “Frances, you have to stop wearing your heart on your sleeve!”  What in the heck was she talking about?  She explained that it was a saying.  “When people are sensitive, it’s like they wear their feelings on the outside of their bodies, readily available for others to poke.”  Is this an ailment?  How can I change this?  As an empath herself, I think she may have struggled with what this all meant and how to cope with it herself.  Over the years of reaching out to my mother about this, her only suggestion was to “toughen up” to not be
“so sensitive.”  My guess is that she really didn’t want me to struggle like she did.

Being a “sensitive” or an “empath” isn’t really something you can change, because it’s a feeling that is incapable of rewiring.  Trust me.  I tried.  I learned to just work with it.  As a nurse, I knew things.  Things that really couldn’t be explained.  Nurse’s intuition?  Maybe.  But, the feelings were growing.  If there was too much chaos (energy) in a room or a situation, it put me on overload.  I would shut down, and sometimes for days.  I remember my mother doing the same thing.  The pattern was becoming a little dark and I felt the light inside of me dimming.  Someone recently asked me at a training, “What does it feel like to be an empath?”  My explanation was simply this, “I feel everyone’s emotion in the room.  I know who’s happy, sad, or struggling with something.  It would be like you, walking into a room, and everyone that was in it was coming up to you and poking you.  That’s what I feel, but on an emotional level.”

As my light was dimming, an opportunity arose for me to embark on a medical sales career, which ultimately was a saving grace.  I learned through presentations and the energy that I put out there, well, I could control the room.  Sure, there would be a naysayer once in a while, but I could handle that.  And, I did.  This was a career that served me well as it allowed me to understand myself as an empath.

Now, I just want to use this energy, wisdom, and intuition to the best of my abilities.  To help others.  To offer insight, free of judgment.  To reach out to my fellow empaths with an embrace of “I know” how you feel.  To empower and enlighten all that are on this roller coaster life journey together.  I’m finally in a profession where I can just be myself.  Wow.  I cannot tell you how amazing it is to use all your knowledge and intuition to help others.  The “curse” that I felt as an empath growing up, has now morphed into a blessing.  Namaste, my friends!

I was asked to blog this story by a friend.

A few months ago, after quitting my job in medical sales and embarking on my Life Coaching career, I started driving for Uber to help with finances.  I also thought this would be a great way to practice some coaching techniques, give out my business cards, and basically network and market my skills.

One day, I picked up a gentleman at an extended-stay hotel with an incredibly heavy pelican case (this is very familiar to those of us in medical sales) and a suitcase that was just as heavy.  We had a bit of a drive ahead of us, so I decided to try and “coach” him.  He wasn’t very talkative at first, but I continued to ask him some questions.  He was a really interesting guy!  He was from California, trying to make it on his own as a distributor for some medical products, and had taken on the responsibility of providing for his family during their tough times.  He got them all “on their feet” so to say, and was experiencing a type of empty nest syndrome.  We continued to chat about his family and his next steps in business.  We discussed what it meant to be an introvert who had learned how to be an extrovert, living our truth, and what it would take for him to make his dreams a reality.  His energy levels soared throughout the drive.

When it came time for me to drop him off, I went back to help him with those heavy cases.  He looked at me and said, “Lady, I don’t know what happened in that magic bus, but I feel so much better!”  He asked me what I did for a living and I told him I was a Life Coach.  He said, “I knew it!!! I just knew it!!!”

Every time I relay this story, it makes me laugh!  I laugh because this gentleman entered the “magic bus” with low energy levels and left with very high energy levels, with newfound freedoms for success, and a purpose.  It reaffirmed in me that as a Life Coach, I’m also living out my life purpose.  It ignited a dream within me, to be a mobile coach.  I may blog more about my mobile coaching at a later date.  In the meantime, you may want to look for the “magic bus” coming to a mind, body, and spirit conference in a city near you VERY soon!

Peace to your hearts today and always, my friends!  🙂

How many dare to step outside the boundaries of a complacent life and test the waters?  Sounds and feels kind of scary now doesn’t it?  Personally, I think being stuck in a complacent syndrome sounds worse.  Let’s look at the definition of “complacency.”  “Complacency:  A feeling of being satisfied with how things are and not wanting to try and make them better.”  Whoah.  That’s some pretty heavy-duty stuff right there!  Where does this come from?

I’ll tell you where….from fear.  From the fear of being hurt, rejected, ohhhh, and of failing.  God forbid we fail at anything, right?!!   Nooo…..honestly we learn so much more from our mistakes than we do from our successes.  It’s all about the struggle people.  The struggles make us stronger, make us more resilient, make us more empowered, and guess what else….more confident!  Confidence from failing?  Yes…unless you let fear rule you and fall into a complacent syndrome.

But, complacency is “safe,” you say.  It’s really not.  Complacency kills.  It kills dreams, it leads to living a life of status quo, it says, “let’s hide your talent in the closet,” and it leads to regrets later on in life.  So, knowing this, who would pick a life of complacency?

You know, I recently spoke with a man who had spent 30 years of his life being complacent.  He had a job he hated with great benefits that he loved.  It hurt his relationships and killed his spirit.  He was able to retire early and is now making enormous strides toward happiness and living out some of his dreams.  Wow.  Do you want to spend 30 years of time doing something you don’t enjoy?  Complacency does that to a person.

As we move forward, I ask each and every one of your reading this blog to stretch just a little out of your comfort zone.  Yes, it’s scary.  You might fail.  But you know what?  There’s always strength in the fall and guess what?  You just might trip and stumble up!

Love and light to your hearts,

Fran